There are a lot of things people don't tell you when you are expecting a child. And then again, there are a lot of things people do tell you (especially after your monster is born) that is unnecessary and/or unwanted.
For those of you who don't know me that well, I am stubborn. (Or so I am told) I also am very opinionated. (Who? Me?!) So most of this "advice" is completely unwanted and royally pisses me off.
What brings all of this up is that today I have to talk my precious angel to get shots since he just turned 3. When I had Bowen I just thought shots were a part of life...and something you did. Until I got talked to about how shots are causing children problems like autism and ruining lives. Well...I got shots as a kid..and I am perfectly normal (heavy on the perfect, easy on the normal). But, as a new mom, this sent me into a frenzy! I mean I did not want to be the one to blame for screwing up my kid. So I talked to my bestie, who didn't get shots and didn't want to get her kids shots. I probably even did some research. And then I called my parents...because that is what you do! My parents are very pro-shots and they eased my fears. I mean I don't want my kid to die of mumps or rhubella, especially when it could be prevented. AND they even have a shot nowadays (not available when I was a kid) for chicken pox, which is one less shitty thing I would have to deal with as a mother. Anyways, I made it through my first encounter (of many) of the evil ones. (AKA the moms/parents/grandparents/strangers who like to give out advice) And Bowen still gets shots...and for all of those who are anti-shots...ya'll can suck it..and not give your kids shots, but this mama is still doing it.
I am a young mom, so I have a ton of run ins with the evil ones, I guess bc they think I need MORE guidance. (Those bitches) One of my other early encounters was regarding the paci! Omg I LOVED (and miss) the pacifier! I never had a paci and neither did my little brothers or sisters. My parents made me think they were unecessary and stupid. (wtf were they thinking?) So B-Nasty as a baby used to whine for a bottle so of course I gave it to him. Then he would puke it all up. This only happened for like a week. And my mom told me, well he might need a paci! So I tried it. And he LOVED it. And I LOVED it. Those things are f'ing amazing!!! He whines, pop a paci in. He cries, pop a paci in. He is going to sleep, pop a paci in. But of course, there were the ones who told me it was ruining my child's teeth. Or tell me shame on me. (F you lady, you want to be awake with him all night? Didn't think so) And like I said, I was a single mom. So during teething times and times when he was just plain fussy, this miraculous plastic nipple type thing, was a life saver. I didn't lose my mind...thus saving B's life. So I say...if you want to use the paci..do it. It is MUCH easier to take that away then a thumb. (which I sucked..forever) And I am proud to announce, it is relatively easy. We took Bowen's away and have been without them for a few months...and everyone lived through it.
Omg my personal favorite of the mommying debate is breastfeeding or bottle feeding. (Me and Watson debate this like once a month..and we aren't even expecting) When B-Nasty was just a wee little shrimp in my belly, I decided I would breastfeed. It was supposed to be bonding, after all. So I took out my piercings (sadly) and bought the nipple cream and breast feeding books. LAME. About 2-3 months before he was to be hatched, I decided I was NOT going to ruin my boobies any more than they already were. And it was SO weird having someone suck on me at all times. AND no one else would be able to help me do it. AND those breast pumping machines seem like some medieval torture device (there is NO reason a nipple should ever stretch that far). Like I said...I had decided. So B-Nasty FINALLY decides to arrive. My first day in the hospital the damn Le Leche League skanks kept asking why I wouldn't breast feed my baby. I nicely responded, "I just don't feel comfortable doing it." And then they would go on and on and on and ON and ON about how much better it was for him and how natural it was. Finally, that night, one came in. I was happily feeding B a bottle of formula..and he seemed to be enjoying it. And SHE started in on how horrible it is for me to feed him formula. So I said (maybe a little forcefully), "Then YOU pop out a boob and feed him!" She left. Thank JESUS! My kid was 8 lbs 5 oz when he was born. I have an A cup. He would have starved!! B-Nasty is now 3...and healthy..looks like a line backer. And we are SO close, we didn't need a boob in a mouth to be bonded. For all those who feel pressured to breast feed, don't let them pressure you. Do what YOU want to do. The energy sucking-stretch mark giving-body ruining child will make it JUST fine.
So there are TONS of things people are going to give you "advice" on as a parents. To spank or not to spank. (I spank...I refuse to let my child be an evil heathen...PLUS its my choice) To co-sleep or not to co-sleep. (We co-slept. And he still gets in bed with me. And I love it and would NEVER change it) To daycare or not to daycare. (I didn't want to, but had to. And now I loooove his daycare, and he is SO effing smart) To let them watch TV or not. (Dude, The Little Einsteins have been a lifesaver before) And so on and so forth. The Evil Ones are out there..waiting..watching..ready to make you their next victim. But I am ready too! With a jab and a kick in the shin. Of course it still pisses me off and annoys me when they offer their "advice", but at the end of the day I know I am a good mommy (a DAMN good mommy, if I do say so myself) so they can kiss my big ass. My rule of thumb now is to never offer parenting advice unless asked. I ask people sometimes (Watson and I have asked everyone about potty training), but it is still up to us to decide how we do things. And everyone has their own way of doing things, and there is no rule book on how to bring up a child, and you just have to do what works for you. And that...is my mommy advice of the day.
For those of you who don't know me that well, I am stubborn. (Or so I am told) I also am very opinionated. (Who? Me?!) So most of this "advice" is completely unwanted and royally pisses me off.
What brings all of this up is that today I have to talk my precious angel to get shots since he just turned 3. When I had Bowen I just thought shots were a part of life...and something you did. Until I got talked to about how shots are causing children problems like autism and ruining lives. Well...I got shots as a kid..and I am perfectly normal (heavy on the perfect, easy on the normal). But, as a new mom, this sent me into a frenzy! I mean I did not want to be the one to blame for screwing up my kid. So I talked to my bestie, who didn't get shots and didn't want to get her kids shots. I probably even did some research. And then I called my parents...because that is what you do! My parents are very pro-shots and they eased my fears. I mean I don't want my kid to die of mumps or rhubella, especially when it could be prevented. AND they even have a shot nowadays (not available when I was a kid) for chicken pox, which is one less shitty thing I would have to deal with as a mother. Anyways, I made it through my first encounter (of many) of the evil ones. (AKA the moms/parents/grandparents/strangers who like to give out advice) And Bowen still gets shots...and for all of those who are anti-shots...ya'll can suck it..and not give your kids shots, but this mama is still doing it.
I am a young mom, so I have a ton of run ins with the evil ones, I guess bc they think I need MORE guidance. (Those bitches) One of my other early encounters was regarding the paci! Omg I LOVED (and miss) the pacifier! I never had a paci and neither did my little brothers or sisters. My parents made me think they were unecessary and stupid. (wtf were they thinking?) So B-Nasty as a baby used to whine for a bottle so of course I gave it to him. Then he would puke it all up. This only happened for like a week. And my mom told me, well he might need a paci! So I tried it. And he LOVED it. And I LOVED it. Those things are f'ing amazing!!! He whines, pop a paci in. He cries, pop a paci in. He is going to sleep, pop a paci in. But of course, there were the ones who told me it was ruining my child's teeth. Or tell me shame on me. (F you lady, you want to be awake with him all night? Didn't think so) And like I said, I was a single mom. So during teething times and times when he was just plain fussy, this miraculous plastic nipple type thing, was a life saver. I didn't lose my mind...thus saving B's life. So I say...if you want to use the paci..do it. It is MUCH easier to take that away then a thumb. (which I sucked..forever) And I am proud to announce, it is relatively easy. We took Bowen's away and have been without them for a few months...and everyone lived through it.
Omg my personal favorite of the mommying debate is breastfeeding or bottle feeding. (Me and Watson debate this like once a month..and we aren't even expecting) When B-Nasty was just a wee little shrimp in my belly, I decided I would breastfeed. It was supposed to be bonding, after all. So I took out my piercings (sadly) and bought the nipple cream and breast feeding books. LAME. About 2-3 months before he was to be hatched, I decided I was NOT going to ruin my boobies any more than they already were. And it was SO weird having someone suck on me at all times. AND no one else would be able to help me do it. AND those breast pumping machines seem like some medieval torture device (there is NO reason a nipple should ever stretch that far). Like I said...I had decided. So B-Nasty FINALLY decides to arrive. My first day in the hospital the damn Le Leche League skanks kept asking why I wouldn't breast feed my baby. I nicely responded, "I just don't feel comfortable doing it." And then they would go on and on and on and ON and ON about how much better it was for him and how natural it was. Finally, that night, one came in. I was happily feeding B a bottle of formula..and he seemed to be enjoying it. And SHE started in on how horrible it is for me to feed him formula. So I said (maybe a little forcefully), "Then YOU pop out a boob and feed him!" She left. Thank JESUS! My kid was 8 lbs 5 oz when he was born. I have an A cup. He would have starved!! B-Nasty is now 3...and healthy..looks like a line backer. And we are SO close, we didn't need a boob in a mouth to be bonded. For all those who feel pressured to breast feed, don't let them pressure you. Do what YOU want to do. The energy sucking-stretch mark giving-body ruining child will make it JUST fine.
So there are TONS of things people are going to give you "advice" on as a parents. To spank or not to spank. (I spank...I refuse to let my child be an evil heathen...PLUS its my choice) To co-sleep or not to co-sleep. (We co-slept. And he still gets in bed with me. And I love it and would NEVER change it) To daycare or not to daycare. (I didn't want to, but had to. And now I loooove his daycare, and he is SO effing smart) To let them watch TV or not. (Dude, The Little Einsteins have been a lifesaver before) And so on and so forth. The Evil Ones are out there..waiting..watching..ready to make you their next victim. But I am ready too! With a jab and a kick in the shin. Of course it still pisses me off and annoys me when they offer their "advice", but at the end of the day I know I am a good mommy (a DAMN good mommy, if I do say so myself) so they can kiss my big ass. My rule of thumb now is to never offer parenting advice unless asked. I ask people sometimes (Watson and I have asked everyone about potty training), but it is still up to us to decide how we do things. And everyone has their own way of doing things, and there is no rule book on how to bring up a child, and you just have to do what works for you. And that...is my mommy advice of the day.
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